Texting for Dummies

Much to my dismay, my older son ~ like many other 5th grade boys, so I have heard ~ is very in-to his cell phone and text messaging. He has two buddies ~ we’ll call them Jay and Steve ~ that are his regular texting compadres. Their text conversations usually go something like this:

Jay: Heyyyyyyyyyyy

Son: Wassssssssup

Jay: Walking home

Son: Cooooool


In my opinion, typical 10-11 year old boy goofy stuff, right?

And how do I know what he texts, might you ask?

YES ~ I CHECK. I have apparently become my mother and believe that children under a certain age in my home have no realistic expectation of privacy. I’m not exactly sure at what age ~ if any ~ that will change for me, but I need not think of that at this moment.

Now to this morning ~ we are sitting at the breakfast table and D’s cell phone is vibrating profusely. I have noticed a sudden greater attachment to the phone over the last week or so ~ he even makes sure to charge it at night in his room so it is ready to take to school in the morning. Prior to this time, the phone usually sat with a dead battery on the kitchen counter for days on end before he ever noticed.

So I scold him this morning and tell him that he cannot be texting while eating breakfast and that he needs to get himself completely ready to go before he can take on such extra activities in the morning. So as he heads off the bathroom to comb his hair, of course I take a peek at the vibrating cell phone that is still sitting on the island in the kitchen.

Imagine my surprise when new string of text messages is displayed ~ not from Jay or Steve like usual ~ but from REBECCA. To my knowledge at this point, girls are still “gross” have been nothing but an irritation to my son and his friends. He rolls his eyes at any mention of a girl being anything else but a nuisance.

As I am still chuckling to myself over this new discovery, D walks back in to the room ~ and the cell phone buzzes again. This is where it gets good.

Mom: So……who has been texting you so much this morning?

Son (without a second of hesitation and adamantly): JAY!!!!!!

Mom: So….does Jay have an alias?

Son: Ummmm…..no…..????

Mom: So then who is Rebecca?

Son (again, without even taking a breath): Rebecca is a BOY!


Now let’s pause here for a moment. Words can’t even describe the look on my son’s face as he loudly proclaims that the Rebecca who had been texting him was a boy. He was flustered and his eyes were as big as saucers. And apparently, like all other kids his age, he thinks his mother was born yesterday.

Mom: Give me a break, Rebecca is NOT a boy.

Son: Yes….a boy in Miss K’s class…..


So here I cut him off and tell him that in no way do I believe that Rebecca is a boy. A Casey, or Jamie maybe…..but not a Rebecca.

Finally ~ the confession comes. Okay, Rebecca is a girl in his class ~ a girl that Jay (his texting buddy) gave Son’s number to (and vice versa) yesterday at school. Ahhhh…..my son is in contact with a girl….on purpose….for the first time in his life.

Even though I was laughing like mad in my head, we went on to have a conversation about how cell phone and texting privileges are based around honesty, and how there was no reason for him to lie to me about who he was conversing with. I don’t mind that he is talking with a girl, and I told him so. And being the mean mom that I am, I told him that future instances of dishonesty like that will result in the cell phone going bye-bye ~ and he knows that I mean it.

And so it has happened ~ my son has discovered girls in some sort of capacity. I had to call Hubby at work to relay the story because I was laughing so hard. It loses something in the re-telling since there is no way to recapture the look on his face, or the swiftness of the almost all-too-eager way that he answered my questions this morning. It was priceless.

So now I am on guard. You can bet your sweet selves that I will be checking text message conversations on a bit more frequent basis, just to make sure the conversations are on the level. I am about to embark on a new era of snooping :P

Someday, this will make a great story for my dear son when I recount for his new wife about his first interactions with a being of the opposite sex. And if and when he is ever blessed with a son himself, I may even suggest that he name him Rebecca :)